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Last day alone... - The highs and lows of KuteLuvr — LiveJournal

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Previous Entry Last day alone... Apr. 28th, 2004 @ 08:24 am Next Entry
Today's my last full day with the house to myself. It's been kinda nice, being able to stretch my legs a bit in the new place. Yet, annoying as soundofthemoon's constant interruptive banter can frequently be, I still miss it, and it'll be nice to have him home.

I missed my workout yesterday. I was supposed to meet lorenzosf at the gym, but there was confusion about the time arrangement, so in the end when I called him he was already there (surprised that I wasn't) and I just gave up for the moment. Nobody's fault kinda thing. I'm honestly finding myself seeking someone that is knowledgeable to help me move forward in my gymbunnyness... a partner that knows something and doesn't mind playing big brother to me a bit... and maybe in classic partner style provide some encouragement on those days you just don't feel like it or are letting yourself cop-out. We'll see what happens... but consider this a casting call for anyone in the Castro! :) (lorenzosf would unquestionably be ideal... and I so enjoyed our last workout... but I don't wanna put that kinda pressure on anyone that's not asking for it directly :P)

I'm having angst about the new boy. I really like him a lot... I don't think I could hand-pick a more ideal person to date. He meets or exceeds all major requirements...
    The Rules
  1. Must be of age
  2. Must have a job
  3. Must not live with parents
  4. Must have a car
  5. Must be out

and yet I can't seem to find the ability(desire?) to turn off the cheaper (playful? promiscuous? uninhibited? slutty?) side of myself. He's completely worth it... I'm just not sure if I'm in that space. I'm going to have to find a way to reconcile these pieces of myself that I've always considered mutually exclusive, or just accept that the timing sucks... and I don't want to hurt anyone.

I'm becomming a complete slacker at work. I think having a constant desire to go out and do something in the city is the main problem. It was usually that I didn't have a constant world of excitement to go home to... home was gorgeous, but relaxed and uneventful. Now, home is gorgeous, and exciting and ever-available. I'm hoping this desire for engagement of the city wanes with time... everyone's told me it will. We'll see.

I miss the KoC crowd. I was happy to be working my way into a group of people that was unpretentious (I was arguably the most pretentious person there, I'd bet) and fun and outgoing. I loved having a reason to see spawrhawk & unbreak_able, some I constantly long to spend time with but find that distance and life's distractions prevent from happening.

Back to forcing myself to work.
Current Mood: blahblah
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Date:April 28th, 2004 09:10 am (UTC)
Your minimum standards crack me up. My own are:

Must be a college graduate
Must be good conversationalist while maintaining sense of propriety
Must not be flaky (e.g. no standing me up, must return calls w/in 24 hours)
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Date:April 28th, 2004 09:12 am (UTC)
I'm thinking our difference in standards is a clear reflection of our various interests. :) I am finding that as I grow older, my standards are less likely to require evaluation. I would ask though... if someone were a college graduate, but didn't have a job, would that matter to you? :)
Date:April 28th, 2004 01:46 pm (UTC)
I could deal with a smart houseboy, yes...

My computer cut off and I didn't get to add my other criteria:

Must be willing to consider that this could be it.
Must play well with others and be publicly presentable.
Must read the paper and care about what happens in the world.
Must be appreciative, or at least open-minded, to at least three of the following:
Haute Cuisine
Broadway musicals
World travel
Alcohol as a fine social lubricant
(Deleted comment)
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Date:April 28th, 2004 07:15 pm (UTC)
as they say, timing is everything. sounds like you've met a really great guy, but if you're not ready to settle down, then there is no sense in trying. who knows? maybe he's not so ready to settle down either. best wishes on that situation.

i can see the glamour that the city would cast. just be careful, don't get to caught up in it. by all means, keep your job safe.

hope to see you again sometime to soon at koc, where life is a little slower paced, but everybody knows your name. *hugs*
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