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Looking both ways... - The highs and lows of KuteLuvr

About Looking both ways...

Previous Entry Looking both ways... May. 6th, 2004 @ 06:07 pm Next Entry
I just realized something... the two people that I've been spending most of my free time with are ex's. Recent ex's. That's just weird. Not bad... but definately weird.

I think initially it started because I was making an active effort to ensure that neither one felt I was choosing one side over the other (which SO often happens, and I despise). At least, that was the initial reason. Now it's just that I've gotten so comfortable with both of them (individually or with friends) and have grown so accustomed to us being available to each other, they're just the people I think of first when I want to do something.

Don't get me wrong... I'm not expressing discontent or uncomfortability or anything... it's not that I think I should spend less time with anyone, or that I feel like I don't have time for others. It's just that it's weird to me that the time I DO spend with friends is, more often than not lately, with two very good but mutually exclusive friends.

Clarification:
These two people are ex's with EACH OTHER. That's what makes it difficult... not ex's with me. (my fault... totally obscure... tx)
Current Mood: confusedperplexed
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From:unbreak_able
Date:May 6th, 2004 06:46 pm (UTC)
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just saying hi and miss seeing you around. love you. ::hugs::
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From:kuteluvr
Date:May 6th, 2004 08:03 pm (UTC)

*wipes tear*

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I would totally come down and hang, but I don't even go in to work anymore but once a week, let alone any further down the peninsula. :( You guys can always come up to the city tho :)

I miss you too tho :)
From:mylifebeforeart
Date:May 6th, 2004 07:04 pm (UTC)
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I've tried to hang out with my ex sometimes, too. But now that he has a new guy (with whom he's already moved in, in a condo they bought together (!) south of market), it isn't as easy.
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From:kuteluvr
Date:May 6th, 2004 08:05 pm (UTC)
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See Clarification... totally my bad. The context of your response made me realize how my statement could be taken.

In response to your comment though, I think it's admirable that you're able to hang out with B (or at least try). The only time I've seen Kxxxx after our breakup, we could barely manage the superficial "how are you? Good. How are you? Good." statement. (and yes, it really was that brief.)
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From:kuteluvr
Date:May 7th, 2004 12:48 am (UTC)
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I pitty the poor person that finds their way into the Chris mindset. :P

Yeah... both of them know that I'm actively maintaining my friendship with the other. I think they also realize that if one of them gave me an ultimatum, "Me or Them!".... the one forcing me to decide is the one that would lose. I don't let other people decide who I am or am not going to be friends with.
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