KuteLuvr (kuteluvr) wrote,

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Bitch, Bitch, Bitch...

As many have probably noticed (well... those that notice, anyway) I haven't really been posting much lately... and I know why: Austin.

Well... not Austin... but "us". See... I mostly post about things that bother me. Granted, there's the rare posting that happens when something good or exceptional happens, but for the most part, I bitch online. Bitch, bitch, bitch. When things are frustrating or bad or annoying, I use my LJ as an outlet to vent... and things are going really, really well. For at least a month, we haven't crossed any major lines (in a bad way). We're letting each other be our individual selves... we're doing things together... we're spending time with both of our friends, both separately and together. We're talking to each other, and listening when the other talks... and somehow managing to UNDERSTAND, which is actually a major success.

I don't think I'm spending as much time with my friends as I think I should (and they deserve). Friendships take effort, and when things are going well with my boyfriend, that's where I end up spending most of my time. When things get rocky or frustrating, I lean on my friends... but they should get the good moods and the bad. To that end I sent spawrhawk a text message wondering if he'd be interested in brunch, but haven't heard back (he's prob not awake, hasn't gotten the message, or just not in the mood... totally cool)... I consider trying lorenzosf, but considering how I flaked on him last weekend, I'm not sure if he'd be interested or get back to me (not that I'd deserve it). Right now, the most solid plan is to see Rebecca this afternoon (preferably with Austin... she hasn't seen us hang out together nearly at all). I did see Elyssa this week, but a moderate emergency kinda cut that short... but I'm glad I made the effort.

All in all, I'm trying to make an balanced effort with my friends. Sure, I'm still a lame-o, and spend most of my time with my boyfriend... but that's probably to be expected. At the same time, they deserve for me to make an effort on my part... and perhaps at this point, having been so supportive, I'm probably in the oweing phase right now. Time to pay up... ;)
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